:: Thursday ::

- A malay guy took a glance at me and say "kesian" and just walk off , he "kesian" me because ukasyah in the carrier with me , i turned and say out loud "what ?!?! " ,but he just ignored . I just dont understand why must he kesian eh , is either i look pathetic carrying a baby or the guy is sympathetic with ukasyah because dapat mother like me ? , when i told syefa, all she can do is laugh out loud .

- Today in history , i single handedly changed ukasyah diapers in public toilet ( i know its not important, but im proud of it )

- Everyone is so much more interesting than I am.
Why ?
Because i feel insecure , i have no social gatherings , always have dreadful high school reunion , stuck with typical-malay-way-of-thinking and surrounded by conservative people.

- Taking someone else feeling into consideration .
Why ?
No, i dont take someone's feeling into consideration unless if that person is important .

:: again ::

" well, i say, u gave me a good feel start , for me a relationship as in a girl and a boy point of view must be a feel , we will have a good future together" - sms from someone-

Oops ! , i think i did it again , giving people the wrong message and impression .


seriously , i don't see the future with u .

:: sacrifice ::

I'm willing to sacrifise anything that can make people happy, but are they willing to do the same thing for me ?

here i am , sitting alone at starbuck,trying to get the fundementals of finance theory inside my head, i tried memorizing by heart [mcm paham jer] , i've just finished sipping 2 venti coffee nut latte , gila kan ?!? , but i'm loving it . and i'm blogging by using my htc ! .

had a rough day yesterday, tried to be awake during meeting after midnite is a big NO , i might have sleeping disorder ,bukan cannot sleep tau, but been sleeping to much, maybe what dian told me is true , im been feeling lethargic cos not been going to the gym for the past one month.

and finally , my mum's side is going to have gathering dis weekend , and im organising slumber party for my lil cousins this thursday.

:: on being thankful ::

1. I'm thankful because i'm blessed with the most understanding parents even though i admit that i can be anak yang paling kurang ajar (self confession , susah dapat wei ).

2. I'm thankful because i have a wonderful siblings who adores me even though i lebih garang dari mak tiri .

3. I'm thankful because i have all these people who always been there for me when i needed them the most dedicated to my aunts and cousins ,( tak semua la kan ) .

4. I'm thankful because i have sisters ( madame bloss, pink, teddie and baby nur ) who cares for me , i maybe the most unfriendliest-mean-straightforward person you all have ever met, but u all tak jemu menasihati walaupun u tahu ia akan masuk telinga kanan and keluar telinga kiri .

5. I'm thankful because i'm surrounded by my bestfriends who been thru up and downs of life since we in primary 6 together .

6. I'm thankful because i'm loving someone who apparently doesnt know that i really loves him , even though i know its impossible to have a future with him .

7. But most importantly, I'm thankful because Allah has provided me with all the best things that i could ever asked for .

:: complicated ::

the test shown that i have a complicated life
but i guess its true
i hate people "jaga tepi kain saya"
sometimes i just felt i wanted to shout straight to their face
of all people in the "whole" family , why must u asked about me ?
nak find faults? nak mengutuk my family ?

yes, other may seems that u care about my family
but i know , ure not !

at this point , i really feel that i want to leave everybody and be somewhere else

:: marlina a.k.a pink's wedding ::

:: untitled ::

how do we become ourselves , without losing each other ?