awkward reunion

meet him at mc donald lido while waiting for others to come
it was really awkward situation
tak kene gaya
then she came
dorg tak berbual,dah jadi makin tak kene gaya
she wanted to start conversation with him, but tak dilayan
the guy keep talking to me, ignoring her
dia dah put me in a very difficult situation
i really donno wat to do , both of them are my frens
then came all the others
we decide to go to lau pa sat
dari situ la prob start
i noe its my mistake sebab tompang moto dia
he purposely using me to get her jealous,
sengaja bawak moto laju2 so that i will hug him
and yes, i do hug him, that is my mistake
kat lau pa sat, she didnt talk to me at all,she ignore me
my best fren ignore me
then came another prob
he purposely put his hands kat pinggang
i was shocked


now, im in deep trouble, he told her that we going to get engaged dis april
and she totally believe it
she wont pick up my calls, wont hear my explanation



my life is falling apart

a few updates

-mak long passed away 2 days ago after suffering from colon cancer
- i won't be joining my family in Abu Dhabi as i just sign a 4 years bond
-will have a busy weekend, preparing cupcakes for Oshin's Birthday Party
- i spent the whole morning at Tampines Library yesterday
- looking forward to spent the whole day with an tmrw.
- i miss aishah and diyana badly




my life is falling apart

falling apart

my previous entry should be my last entry
but i have no choice
i need to penned down everything
i have no one to talk to
and i rather be alone

i've gained 5kg
dah nearly 2 mths tak go gym
im getting fatter and uglier,seriously

i'm starting to miss him again
badly

im starting to hate my life
i really do,seriously

for people who is reading dis
i need no sympathy, comment, or any advice from u
there is so much anger inside of me
so much pain
hatred


i wish i can just kill someone
or
maybe i can run away to another country, start a new life alone
or
maybe i just go to bahrain
or
maybe i just accept the fate that written for me


everybody deserve to be happy
but not me
im confused


my life is falling apart

They asked for it ...

havent update my blog for nearly 2 weeks, here some update bout me : -

- been doing alot of thinking

- realised who is a true fren and whos not

- i think i should be more secretive bout my life

- start think bout myself ( kalau dulu selalu pikir bout other ppl feelings, but now, wat the heck..... )

- i think (80%) i should move to Abu Dhabi with my parents, start a new life there, 0 frens

- get my life busy

- NO one can tell me that i should change, im happy with the way i am

-being doing solat istikharah tu mintak pentunjuk sama ada i should acce[t the job @ Bahrain

- been really upset,cos some people tot that im going after her hubby

- and yg paling sedih is when a fren yg i kenal from primary sch accused me of ruining her relationship with her bf ( now her ex )

-so the conclusion of all dis is, not to trust sesapa, trust your self, jgn dengar cakap org, jgn pikir pasal org, pikir diri sendiri, i think its better for me to be my old self, secretive, sensitive and super duper selfish

- dis may be may be my last entry

wallahu a'lam,